I'll admit it! It's been a very tough 6 months since Lily Belle left on her journey to the Rainbow Bridge. I'm crying again now just typing those words.... The Rainbow Bridge...… Yes, today is 6 months.
Just how the heck do you mend broken hearts? Ours are still so shattered.
She came into our lives for a reason. She helped me heal both physically and emotionally after 10 surgeries (2 were lifesaving.) God gently laid her in my arms that day back in 2004. And every day for those almost 14 years she was a blessing.
She's forever embedded in our hearts. We remember all the love between us, all the wonderful times we shared, the softness of her fur, the way she loved having her belly rubbed, the way she always had to be snuggled up against our face for kisses and every wonderful thing about her but we find it just breaks our hearts more knowing she is gone. She had the sweetest soul.
Life is a long path that we must walk down. This path has been our hardest walk yet.
We are keeping really busy (so don't think we're just sitting home 27/7 crying in our soup. We're not!) I went back to work part time helping (yet again) another elderly neighbor. We're still dealing with the insurance company about the hurricane damage to our house and getting a ton of estimates for them. Rolf is always helping the elderly here also. We try to have one of us at home with Muffin all the time because of her congestive heart failure. We are too afraid to leave her home alone. We are smothering her in love. But every time she coughs we hold our breath. We have a hard time knowing what lies ahead. How much more can the heart handle.
Have you ever said, I'll never get another dog because the pain is too much to handle? Come on, Rolf and I can't be the only ones that have these thoughts. Don't get me wrong, we have a ton of love to give another little one (down the road) but right now Rolf said not a chance, not going thru this pain again. And you know what? I totally get it!! Broken hearts are tough...
Please keep our sweet Lily Belle in your thoughts today. She was such a special little girl.
We just miss everything about her. Please someone tell me, it does get easier, doesn't it?
Hugs,
Kim
It does not get easier. I said I'd never love a dog as much as I loved Barkley, yet here we have Abby the rescue, and I love her so much as well. Getting another dog and risking that heartache again is tough decision but I'm glad we made it. She was in a high kill shelter awaiting being put down when we got her. A good decision for both of us. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for the honesty!
DeleteAfter all the losses that we've suffered over the years, and there have been many, I can honestly say, no it does not get easier. Whenever a special little family member is called to the bridge, they always take a piece of our hearts with them. And this leaves a hole in our hearts. But they also leave a part of them behind. That is the part we have to hold onto and hold on very tight. Everyone has a different way of grieving. In our case it seems we are always sent a new little soul who needs us as much as we need them to help fill that little empty space. When Holly left us on February 1, it didn't take long for us to adopt our new little Lexi. We just stumbled across her picture one day on a rescue site and her little broken jaw caught our eye and we knew we had to be there for her. Sometimes I think Holly sent her. I'm sending you a special hug today and also all our love. Hang in there.
ReplyDeleteThanks Linda! It's just been so difficult.....
DeleteBailey was truly one of a kind, God's gift and I honestly doubt we will ever have another dog like him, but I can't imagine my life without Annie. Life is hard and losses are always a part of it. Our choice was a little different because Katy couldn't survive as an only dog. She needed a friend or she's impossible to live with so that was never a question. However, for me I think it will be a physical thing, can I physically provide for the dogs, the walking, the care, etc. The loss sucks, but the love before is amazing, unconditional and I can't imagine when we lose one we won't try for another.
ReplyDeleteI wish you well on your journey. Grief is hard.
Grief is extremely hard, that's for sure! One never thinks about losing their baby when they first lock eyes and fall in love.
DeleteIt doesn't so much get easier as it gets less immediate. Momma can smile about Cinderella and Scribbles now, three years after they passed, but she'll still get leaky-eyed sometimes. Jessie and Casey are still a raw pain. We understand completely how you feel about Muffin right now, and about maybe getting another dog. Momma hates not having a dog in the house, but she's not ready yet.
ReplyDelete~Pigeon
I just can't imagine NOT having a fur-child in the house! But time will tell..... We are focusing on Muffin and her heart failure right now. I don't want to even think that she'll be leaving us too.
DeleteMom said she always ached for the puppies who left for the bridge and that time did not erase that ache but did help stop the tears. After Leroy & Reggie left she and dad said "NEVER AGAIN!" Five years later their hearts still ached until me and Stanley came to dilute the ache with love and mom said it was much better. She said if the only thing in the heart is ache then it is harder to live with.
ReplyDeleteKeep Calm & Love Pups,
Murphy & Stanley
Thanks doods! It's just been so very emotional for all of us.
DeleteMy heart just aches for you and I wish I could hug you in person. This was so beautiful, we will always remember your precious girl, sending (((hugs))) for Muffin too xoxo
ReplyDeleteThanks Caren. Life sure ain't easy. We're really strong people but this has shaken us to the core.
DeleteIt took me at least a year for the pain to ease from losing Greta. As hard as it is to lose them no matter what age they are I can not imagine life without a pug in it. lots of hugs
ReplyDeleteHazel, Mabel & Mom
Thanks for your comment. I can't imagine a house without a pup in it either, but I know our hearts have to really heal first and we have to take care of our little Muffin and her heart failure. We pray she will stay with us for a long time.
DeleteI do get it... It's been 6 years since I lost Angel K, and my heart still hurts. But the thing that got me back into life was adding Shyla. She needs us so much that she lifts us up. She's completely different from K but that's okay.
ReplyDeleteBut, I get it that you want to wait. Just remember that you would never have had the joy of Lily Belle if you hadn't been willing to go through the heart-breaking end. Sending lots and lots and lots of love.